Celebrate the wildest time of the year with these classic (and not so classic) movies celebrating surf, sand and sex!
The time of beer bongs, bikinis, and drunken beach parties is now gloriously upon us, and in case you need some revving up before the start of the inevitable bacchanalia, CraveOnline is here with a list of the most hilarious, boob-filled, terrifying, and poignantly coming-of-agey Spring Break movies in the history of the tradition. From ‘80s teen sex romps, to post-millennial apocalyptic shark attacks, to psychedelic ‘60s beach parties, CraveOnline proudly presents our favorite spring break movies of all-time.
Spring Break (1983)
Two college nerds from the Midwest journey to Ft. Lauderdale, mythic land of beachside wet T-shirt contests and drunken sexual revelry, in this gloriously prototypical ‘80s boobfest. The frivolity of their youthful antics is disrupted when the fun, crazy tourist hotel they’re staying at is threatened with foreclosure from the primary nerd’s Grinchy stepfather, forcing them to retool their powers of debauchery in service to the greater good.
Less famous for its piranhas than for being utterly filled with wall-to-wall T&A, this 3-D remake of Joe Dante’s 1978 original was panned by many critics upon its release, but as far as dumb party entertainment is concerned, you could seriously do a lot worse. It even has Christopher Lloyd in a few scenes playing a crazy ichthyologist. Plus topless paragliding and naked underwater lesbians. You can’t lose.
Where the Boys Are (1960)
A group of female college students road trip to Ft. Lauderdale in search of parties, beer, and male attention. Considered extremely scandalous in its day for its bold pronouncements about female sexuality and the normalcy of premarital sex, it also presages the ‘80s teen sex boom with eerie precision, and is marred only slightly by its annoyingly preachy downer ending.
Spring Break Shark Attack (2005)
Hot ladies and rugged townies are terrorized by angry tiger sharks plaguing a hotspot seaside resort for vacationing college students. This movie was made for TV, and combines the ridiculous pleasures of Z-grade monster movies, outré teen sex romps, and melodramatic after-school specials into a single, unintentionally hilarious package.
Spring Breakers (2013)
This movie tragically won’t exist until next year, but it’s currently being directed by the totally insane Harmony Korine, of Trash Humpers and Gummo fame, and stars Selena Gomez, accidental Internet nude Vanessa Hudgens, and Glee’s Heather Morris as trashy college girls blackmailed by James Franco into committing crimes while wearing weird pink face masks and fluorescent hot pants. In case you are unconvinced, these production stills clearly prove beyond any reasonable doubt that this is going to be the greatest movie ever made.
Y Tu Mama Tambien (2001)
Two boys with a crush on the same older woman agree to go with her on a road trip through Mexico, which quickly devolves into an emotionally tumultuous sexual free-for-all. In addition to be hilarious and filled with nudity, this movie won tons of awards, so you get to feel cultured and smart for enjoying it.
Down In the Valley (2005)
For those with bleaker and more twisted inclinations, Evan Rachel Wood plays Tobe, a bored and rebellious teenage girl who falls impulsively into bed with Edward Norton, a dislocated out-of-towner obsessed with the chivalry of the old west. Things go sour when Tobe’s dad finds out about the relationship, touching off a mounting series of violent, confrontational showdowns.
How to Stuff a Wild Bikini (1965)
Probably the most self-consciously pseudo-psychedelic of the Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello beach party franchise that ruled the 1960s teen scene, How to Stuff a Wild Bikini stands out for having the goofiest title, as well as a the weirdest and most virulently catchy soundtrack. Other worthwhile entries in the series include Beach Blanket Bingo, Muscle Beach Party, and 1987’s cameo-packed nostalgia spectacle, Back to the Beach (featuring Pee-Wee Herman as himself).